Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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