I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
