Joe is yelling at the trees again.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
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