I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
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