no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
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And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
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The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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