its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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