He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
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It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
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It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
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