in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
