There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
