Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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