Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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