I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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