a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
Can I put tequila in the fish bowl? I think he wants to party too
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
