the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
I have peed in a lot of sinks
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
