How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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