How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
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