at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
