just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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