She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
