Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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