How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Randomize
