i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN