He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
