My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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