I just made out with a guy for $7.
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
Randomize