I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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