So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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