Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
My breasts were aching with rage.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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