I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
