I discovered last night there is no graceful way to remove your face from your gf's crotch when your parents walk in the room
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
