You can't motorboat a personality
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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