I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
There was an unopened condom by my car when I went to pick it up this morning. Someone may have fucked on the hood of my car last night. Don't think it was me but I can't rule it out 100%.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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