The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
She got all mad because she said it was "unprofessional" to tell my manager to go fist herself.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
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