I bet he comes in French.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
Randomize
