nut hugger
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize