I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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