What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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