ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Hey bro are you still alive??? I'm sure you are wondering how you ended up laying on the floor at the foot of your bed and why there is a wheelchair by your door....
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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