Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
