True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
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