fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
