youre lurking in front of me
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
