yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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