I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
