ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
