After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
