I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Randomize
