Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
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We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
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I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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