i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
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