If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
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